Sometimes, in life, we get caught up in being givers – loving, caring and putting others before ourselves. While taking care of those around us can be a very rewarding experience, it’s equally important to take care of ourselves.
In this blog, we begin by exploring the numerous benefits of self-care and self-compassion, as well as how to practise self-care and mindful self-compassion. From there, we move on to some practical self-care tips and self-compassion strategies to rediscover happiness in your life.
Whether you are recovering from a difficult period or simply looking to make some positive changes, this article will provide you with the guidance and inspiration you need to start living your life to the fullest. So, let’s get started!
There are many benefits to being accepting, kind and patient with yourself.
Being self-compassionate helps us regulate negative emotions. Rather than being caught up in them, it allows one to process low moods, anxiety and stress more easily, and focus one’s energy on solving the problem at hand.
In addition, practising self-compassion teaches you to try again, encouraging a growth mentality and allowing you to build resilience.
There are times when being self-critical leads us down a rabbit hole.
For example, when we inadvertently embarrass ourselves in public speaking, we might think, ‘Oh no, I sounded so nervous and stupid. I will never do well in life.’ It might cause us to withdraw or give up.
Practising self-compassion and self-care allows us to change this perspective. We might then think, ‘It’s okay that this presentation didn’t go as well. I will learn from this and find ways to do better next time. With practice, I will get better at this, just like I have become skilled at other things.’
Being self-compassionate is not the same as being complacent, conceited or self-pitying.
Everyone makes mistakes. It is important to be patient with ourselves when we do too. Being compassionate to ourselves allows us to deal with situations in a more helpful manner and guides us to try again.
Sometimes, as these thoughts are automatic, they make us feel bad even though we do not actively process them at the time. Hence, watch your thoughts closely. The next time you find yourself thinking, ‘I’ll never be good enough’, label the thought as a negative one and stop yourself there. Being mindful allows us to stop ruminating on negative thoughts.
Once you identify your negative thoughts, replace them with self-compassion and understanding. One way to do so is to respond to your critical inner voice as you would to a close friend uttering the same words.
Now, imagine that your friend is being self-critical out loud. Your friend says, ‘I am a worthless idiot, and I will not be able to do this.’ What would you reply? You might say to them: ‘You are not worthless! It was just one small mistake. People make mistakes all the time!’
Most of us are encouraging and empathetic to those we love. Remember, you deserve the kindness you show to others, too.
Another way to practise self-compassion is to think of someone who you feel embodies the quality of compassion. It could be a family member or a fictional character.
What would that person say to you if they were here? Emulate the tone and the words they might use.
It always helps to prepare encouraging words or phrases during joyful moments and use them when negative thoughts hit. These reminders can be kept somewhere accessible, like on the back of your phone.
For example, we like the quote ‘You are a match for your mountains.’ It empowers and uplifts us immediately, making us more ready to take on a challenge. Writing the quote down and pasting it on your wall can be a reminder at times when you feel low that you have the strength to get through whatever you’re facing. Creating such quote posters about self-compassion can be a self-care activity in itself!
We all aspire to achieve happiness, yet it can be so elusive at times. For some of us, happiness is a fleeting feeling that comes and goes with the ups and downs of life. For others, it is a state of mind that’s often present, regardless of the circumstances. So, what exactly is happiness? Is it a state of being that we can attain, or is it something more abstract and subjective? How to be happy again?
There are many avenues to explore when it comes to finding new happiness. Practising self-care and self-compassion is one such avenue. True happiness is when you’re at peace with yourself and start loving yourself for who you are.
If you’re wondering how to practise self-care and self-compassion, here are some activities to help you explore your own definition of happiness:
One key to finding happiness in your life again is by reconnecting with your passion. It’s easy to get lost in the day-to-day grind and lose sight of what truly brings you joy. Therefore, exploring your interests and hobbies and setting aside time to do something you enjoy can reignite that spark within you. This might mean trying new things, rediscovering old hobbies, or pursuing a new career.
If you're unsure of where to start or how, begin by envisioning achievable and specific goals. For instance, if you are keen to take up baking, you can start by following a simple recipe and mastering the basics first. These can help you stay motivated and focused, even when things get tough.
To avoid procrastination, you can also plan and track your weekly or monthly schedule in advance. This allows you to dedicate a bit of time regularly to engage in an activity you enjoy.
Remember that happiness is a journey, and it is up to you to decide what works for you.
Another way to make yourself happier is by tweaking your lifestyle. Even small self-care activities like changing up your diet or starting an exercise routine can improve your physical and mental health.
A balanced diet is essential for your overall health and happiness. Research says that what you put into your body affects how it responds, so eating a balanced and healthy diet is crucial.
Fried foods, high-sodium meals, and sugary snacks can all negatively impact your mood and physical health, leading to issues like hypertension, diabetes, and high cholesterol.
Of course, you don’t have to stay away from them altogether. Instead, try being more mindful of your dietary habits and eating in moderation.
Studies have shown that exercise can be an effective way to combat depression and improve your overall mood. In fact, a research paper by the University of Toronto found that physical activity can help keep depression at bay. In a similar study, researchers assigned three groups of depressed people to either antidepressants, physical activity, or a combination of the two. The exercise-only group had the lowest relapse rate at just 9% six months later.
If you are struggling to find time to exercise, try starting with small changes like taking a walk during your lunch break or trying a new workout routine. The key is to find activities that you enjoy and that are also compatible with your lifestyle.
Remember, self-care and self-compassion don’t always look like lavender salt baths and skin care routines – exercise is one of the best ways to make time for yourself!
Your experiences are your most valuable possessions. They are unique to you, bringing you longer-lasting delight than material possessions ever could. For example, while buying new things might bring initial joy, this feeling may be momentary, particularly after newer or trendier products hit the shelves. On the other hand, lived experiences like travelling to new places, trying new hobbies, and making memories with loved ones can bring happiness that lasts far beyond the moment.
Psychologist Thomas Gilovich has extensively researched the value of special memories and enjoyable experiences. As per a study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, we derive a great sense of happiness from our experiences because they become an integral part of our personal narrative and sense of identity. They also connect us with others and create memories that we can look back on with fondness.
While self-compassion and self-care are important, the company you keep is also essential in finding happiness. It is important to surround yourself with individuals who support and uplift you, and whose values align with your own.
Caring for pets and plants has also shown evidence of positively impacting moods. So, if you are feeling down, spending time with a furry friend or tending to your indoor garden could be just the boost you need. Nonetheless, do keep in mind that ultimately, happiness means different things to different people. While the tips mentioned above can serve as a starting point, it is up to you to find what truly makes you happy.
Keeping a gratitude and self-compassion journal is one simple yet effective way to increase happiness. It is no secret that our brains tend to focus on negative things. However, by consciously directing our attention towards positive things, we can learn how to be happy again.
The benefits of self-compassion and gratitude are numerous, including reducing stress and improving relationships.
To start a gratitude and self-compassion journal, try mentally reciting three things you are thankful for as soon as you wake up. You can also keep a physical list nearby to remind yourself periodically throughout the day.
For example, in your daily log, you can write something like this:
Another way to practise gratitude is by thanking someone for their help or kindness. This can be as simple as saying a word of thanks or buying them a cup of coffee. Additionally, volunteering a few hours each week is a great way to give back and feel good about yourself.
If you are sceptical about the benefits of gratitude, there is scientific proof to back it up. Numerous studies have shown that practising gratitude and self-compassion can improve overall well-being, increase happiness, and even have physical health benefits.
So, start your day on the right foot by maintaining a gratitude and self-compassion journal. It is a simple yet powerful self-care and self-compassion exercise to shift your focus towards positivity and happiness.
Getting caught up in the hustle and bustle of our daily lives is often inevitable. Still, it's essential to remember that our actions play a significant role in shaping our happiness. We can improve our mood and rediscover happiness by putting together a simple self-care routine.
One of the easiest self-care activities to improve happiness is to spend time outdoors. Even if it is just a quick walk outside, it can help you connect with nature and release endorphins – the body’s natural ‘happy pills.’ So, instead of rushing through your day, try to take a few moments to appreciate the world around you.
Another simple way to increase happiness is by smiling, even at strangers. Studies show that smiling can release brain chemicals that promote positive feelings. And don’t worry if it is not a genuine smile; the act alone can still trigger a positive response.
Engaging in altruistic actions, such as volunteering or helping others, can also significantly impact happiness. These actions activate the parts of the brain that make you feel needed and fulfilled, boosting your mood significantly.
Finally, let’s not forget about the power of self-care activities like singing, humming, or even skipping. These activities may seem silly, but they can improve your mood because they are typically associated with happy and carefree times. So, don’t be afraid to let loose and have a little fun!
Being kind to oneself is a gradual, ongoing process, but it is worth the effort.
Seek guidance from a counsellor if you require more help to get through a challenging period.
Self-compassion and self-care activities help manage negative emotions, build resilience, and encourage a growth mindset.
Techniques like recognising negative thoughts, maintaining a self-compassion journal, treating yourself as kindly as you would a friend, and keeping uplifting reminders handy can help shift your perspective and rediscover happiness.
Remember, everyone makes mistakes, and being patient with yourself is key to overcoming challenges.
Life is unpredictable, and we all have bad days. But even on those days, try to find something positive to appreciate. It is possible to find happiness again. So don’t give up on yourself, and step by step, you will soon create and lead the happy life you envisioned!
If you are in crisis, or another person may be in danger, do not use this site. Please refer to these resources instead.
Mon - Fri (excluding public holidays)
9.30 AM - 6 PM (+08:00 GMT)
© 2025 Talk Your Heart Out Pte Ltd
Need Help? Chat with us
