What Is True Love? How to Know If You’ve Found the One

It’s a question many of us find ourselves coming back to at different points in life: ‘What is true love?’

Sometimes it may come up when you’re in a relationship and quietly wondering, ‘Is this it? Have I found love?’ At other times, it might come from past experiences that didn’t quite feel right.

With so many ideas, perceptions, and opinions about love around us, it can be hard to tell what’s real and what’s just expectation, idealisation, or even internalisation.

The truth is, real love is not always fireworks and butterflies. In many cases, it feels steady, grounding, and much quieter than what we’ve been conditioned to expect.

If you’ve been wondering how to know if it’s true love, this guide will help you understand what it can feel like, what to look out for, common myths to be wary of and how couples counselling can help you understand your feelings and grow closer to your partner.

Introduction to TYHO

Our platform connects clients to vetted and experienced Therapists in Singapore who are well qualified in providing couples therapy and marriage counselling - both in-person as well as online therapy. A majority of our Therapists are members of recognised bodies such as the Singapore Association for Counselling (SAC) and the Singapore Psychological Society (SPS). If you'd like help with selecting someone suitable for relationship counselling in Singapore, WhatsApp us at +65 9831 0005 or email us at [email protected].

What Does True Love Feel Like? Signs You’ve Found True Love

True love can feel different for different people. At the same time, there are certain experiences that many people tend to relate to when they are in a healthy and meaningful relationship.

If you’re wondering whether what you’re experiencing is real love, here are some signs from couples experts that can help you understand the nature of your feelings better:

1) You feel accepted for who you are

You don’t feel like you have to change any part of yourself to be loved by your partner. There is space in the relationship for your strengths as well as your imperfections, and you feel valued and loved just as you are.

2) Healthy communication comes naturally

Conversations flow easily, and even when broaching difficult topics there is a willingness and openness to talk things through.

You may find that:

• You can express your thoughts without fear
• Disagreements are addressed instead of being avoided
• Both of you make an effort to listen to each other

3) You support each other’s growth

True love should never feel limiting. It allows and, more importantly, supports both people to grow as individuals.

Partners encourage each other’s dreams and goals, even when they require change or effort on their part.

4) Conflicts are resolved respectfully

Disagreements are a natural part of any relationship.

What often matters more is how they are handled. In healthy relationships, conflicts may still feel uncomfortable, but they are less likely to snowball into hurtful or disrespectful interactions because both partners stay empathetic, respect boundaries and listen to each other.

5) You feel secure in the relationship

There is a sense of emotional steadiness and security in the relationship. You may not feel the need to constantly question where you stand and seek reassurance about your partner’s feelings. You may also wish to talk to a couples counsellor to make your relationship feel more secure. 

5 Common Myths About True Love

There are many societal ideas about love that sound convincing but may not always reflect how relationships work in real life. Here are a few common myths to look out for:

• True love is effortless. In reality, most relationships need consistent effort, mutual communication, and understanding that is built over time
• You’ll never have conflicts. Disagreements are a normal part of relationships, including healthy and loving ones
• There is only one soulmate. As humans, we can always build meaningful connections with more than one person in life
• Love should always feel intense. Real love often feels steady, calm, secure, and grounding rather than constantly exciting
• Your partner should meet all your needs. One person cannot fill all roles in one’s life. Healthy relationships always hold space for individuality and external support through friendships and familial love

How Couples Counselling Can Help You Understand Love and Relationships

At times, it can be difficult to understand your own feelings and where they fall on the spectrum of love.

Talking to a couples counsellor in Singapore can offer a space to reflect on what you are both experiencing, without feeling judged or pressured.

During counselling sessions, you may begin to explore your patterns in relationships, understand what you each value, learn how to communicate your needs more clearly, and grow closer as a couple.

Over time, this can help build a relationship that is healthy and fulfilling for all partners involved.

If you’re looking to explore this further, you can learn more about our services on our Singapore couples counselling page!

FAQs About True Love
 

Key Takeaways

• True love feels safe, steady, supportive and grounding

• It involves mutual trust, respect, and a willingness to grow together

• Healthy relationships require consistent effort from both partners

• It is normal to have doubts and questions about love at times

• Couples counsellors can help you better understand your feelings and relationship patterns

Finding clarity around love can take time, and we’d like to remind it is okay to move at your own pace. To get started with couples counselling at TYHO, click on the “Show all couples counsellors” button below.