Pre-Marital Counselling in Singapore: Why It Matters More Than You Think
Last Updated on May 30, 2025 by Manassa Shrikanth
Reviewed by April Justice, LICSW
- Published on 29 May 2025
Do you think pre-marital counselling is only for couples facing relationship issues?
It’s a common misconception, but the truth is that many couples in Singapore are turning to pre-marital counselling – not because they have problems, but because they want to prevent them. It’s a chance to learn more, connect deeper and future-proof your marriage with a strong foundation.
Join us in the following sections to learn more about pre-marital counselling in Singapore and how it can lay the groundwork for a long, happy and fulfilling marriage.
This Article Contains:
What to Expect in Pre-Marital Counselling
How would you prepare for your wedding? You’d probably pore over wedding plans, run through itineraries multiple times and double-check guest lists, making sure everything is as perfect as possible.
Just as wedding planning prepares you for the big day, pre-marital counselling in Singapore prepares you for the marriage that follows!
While pre-marital counselling does help address conflicts and differences, research shows that it’s also a proactive means to ensure you’re emotionally ready and start your marriage as strongly as you can.
If you’re wondering what couples counselling before marriage looks like, you’ve come to the right place! The following sections take you through common topics you may address, key skills you’ll learn, and the overall process of pre-marital counselling in Singapore.
A Safe Space: 7 Topics You May Address During Pre-Marital Counselling in Singapore
Considering that you’re planning to get married, you and your partner may already have a strong relationship where you talk openly and understand each other deeply.
Even so, pre-marital counselling can help you dig deeper into topics that are hard to discuss.
Here are some common topics that you may explore during pre-marital counselling in Singapore:
1) Roles & Expectations
Eg: What do you expect from your partner in daily life, be it housework, emotional availability or just active answers in conversations?
2) Finances
Eg: Are you aligned on how you approach spending, saving, debt, joint accounts, or budgeting for the future?
3) Intimacy & Affection
Eg: How do you typically express love, and how would you like your partner to express affection?
4) Religion, Culture, & Values
Eg: Are there any traditions or beliefs that matter to each of you? What happens when they differ or contradict each other?
5) Children & Parenting
Eg: Do you want to have children? If yes, when? What kind of parenting styles do you wish to practise?
6) Family Boundaries
Eg: How involved do you want your extended family to be in your relationship? What boundaries need to be set here?
6) Conflicts & Individual Struggles
Eg: How does each of you deal with individual stress? What support do you need during difficult times? How do you handle relationship conflicts?
A Toolkit for Life: 5 Skills You’ll Learn in Pre-Marital Counselling
Conflicts and difficulties are a natural part of life, and thus of marriage too.
But what if you could start your married life armed with a toolkit of relationship skills? That’s precisely what pre-marital counselling in Singapore can equip you with!
Below are some tools, skills, and strategies you may learn during pre-marital counselling in Singapore:
1) Constructive Communication
Your marriage counsellor can help you learn how to speak so your partner truly hears you, and how to listen without defensiveness.
Skills you may develop include active listening and managing tough conversations without shutting down reflexively or blowing up emotionally.
2) Conflict Resolution
As we already noted, disagreements are a natural part of relationships. What matters is the way you handle them.
Counselling equips you with healthy strategies to de-escalate arguments and move forward without resentment or lingering hard feelings.
3) Problem-Solving as a Team
Whether it’s about money, family obligations, or career changes, pre-marital counselling in Singapore can help you build skills to work through challenges together instead of falling into blame or avoidance.
4) Emotional Regulation & Mutual Support
Understanding your own emotional triggers (as well as your partner’s) can help you show up for each other with more empathy and patience, especially during stressful times.
Through pre-marital counselling in Singapore, you can also learn effective ways to manage and regulate your emotions.
5) Long-Term Goal Setting
During pre-marital counselling in Singapore, you may discuss individual and shared dreams, such as starting a family, career goals, and retirement plans, and how to align them realistically.
The Process: How Marriage Counselling Sessions in Singapore Work
In Singapore, pre-marital counselling is widely accessible through private therapists, counselling centres, and some community organisations.
Here’s what you can generally expect from counselling sessions:
a) Format
Pre-marital counselling sessions are typically conducted in-person, online or in a hybrid format, depending on what works best for you and your partner.
You may attend sessions as a couple, though some counsellors also prescribe occasional solo check-ins if needed.
Online pre-marital counselling is ideal for couples who live apart, in different cities or countries. It offers the unique option of partners attending sessions together, but from different places!
b) Number of Sessions
Most couples go for around four to eight sessions, but the timeline can vary from couple to couple. Some may require only a few focused conversations, while others may need more time and space to explore topics in depth.
Together with your marriage counsellor, you may decide on a therapeutic plan, one that lays out how often and for how long you wish to engage in pre-marital counselling in Singapore.
c) Session Length
Each pre-marital counselling session typically lasts between 45 and 90 minutes, giving you sufficient time to discuss a couple of key areas each time.
d) Approach
Sessions are guided by a counsellor and follow a structured approach. However, counselling is always flexible, and a good counsellor will always place you at the centre of your therapeutic journey.
Contrary to popular opinion, your pre-marital counsellor won’t provide advice or lectures – instead, they’ll help you both reflect, ask questions, and work through ideas together.
4 Reasons Why Pre-Marital Counselling is More Important than You Think
As we saw in an earlier section, planning a wedding can involve a lengthy list of tasks, including dresses, venues, guest lists, honeymoon plans, and more. Amid all this, it can be easy to overlook perhaps the most important part: preparing for the marriage itself.
Pre-marital counselling offers you a safe, secure and professionally facilitated arena to do just that! Marriage counselling ensures a host of benefits.
Here are some reasons why more and more couples are choosing to go for pre-marital counselling in Singapore:
1) It Helps You Spot Blind Spots Early & Prevent Future Issues
Every couple has blind spots – the day-to-day or long-term decisions that you haven’t thought to explore yet because things are going well, or ones that you’re subconsciously avoiding.
Many a time, couples don’t even realise they need to talk about these until they actually happen. Pre-marital counselling helps address them much before they turn into misunderstandings.
During pre-marital counselling in Singapore, you might uncover and discuss the following blind spots:
- Division of responsibilities at home – Who handles what when it comes to chores, errands, or caregiving?
- Financial planning for the future – Will you be combining finances? Open a joint account? How do you handle budgeting, savings, or debt?
- Decisions around family and children – Do you want kids? When? How do you feel about fertility planning or adoption?
- Living arrangements and relocation – Where will you live? Is one partner moving in with the other? Are you open to moving for work or family?
- Cultural and religious considerations – Are there religious differences, rituals, or celebrations to navigate?
- Boundaries with extended family and friends – Where will you be spending holidays? How often will you visit extended family? What boundaries do you want to set with in-laws?
- Health and ageing – Have you discussed things like health emergencies, caregiving roles, retirement plans and wills?
Remember that these differences and blind spots aren’t red flags. They’re simply opportunities to build understanding now, instead of repairing damage in case they become an issue later.
2) It’s a Reality Check (in a Good Way)
When you’re swept up in the excitement of planning a wedding, pre-marital counselling helps you hit pause and ask yourselves, ‘Are we really prepared for what comes after the celebration?’
It’s a reality check that may seem harsh, but it’s a healthy and much-needed one. It invites both partners to explore what being married actually means to them.
Pre-marital counselling in Singapore also opens up space to talk about the real-life adjustments that follow the big day.
During counselling for engaged couples, you might reflect on the following questions:
- Are you both emotionally ready for commitment, not just legally or socially, but mentally and emotionally?
- Are you deciding to get married without any sort of external pressure? Eg peer pressure, familial influence or societal stigma?
- What kind of marriage are you trying to build, or what does marriage mean to each of you?
- How do you plan to deal with stress, setbacks, or changes that may come after marriage, individually and together?
Think of pre-marital counselling as holding up a mirror – not to judge your relationship, but to help you step into marriage with clarity and confidence.
3) It Brings Out Expectations & Assumptions
Pre-marital counselling can also help bring to light unspoken beliefs, expectations and assumptions. These are the ‘I thought we were on the same page about these’ moments.
While blind spots tend to be external or practical gaps, assumptions and expectations are often internal or unconscious. Many of these may stem from how we were raised, what we internalised from relationships around us and our subconscious beliefs.
Pre-marital counselling in Singapore can dig out hidden expectations and assumptions, such as the following:
- Emotional needs & love languages – Are there any unspoken emotional expectations? Do you expect your partner to know how you feel without expressing it verbally? Do you need words of affirmation, physical touch, or quality time, and does your partner know about these?
- Conflict and communication styles – Do you expect calm discussions, or were you raised around frequent arguments? Do you tend to avoid confrontation or prefer to talk things out? More importantly, have you discussed these with your partner?
- Gender roles and emotional labour – Are there any internalised ideas about who should ‘take care of’ what? Is it expected for one partner to move in with the other? Is one partner expected to do all or most of the household chores?
- Career and work-related expectations – Are there expectations about who works, who stays home, or who relocates?
4) It’s a Proven Investment for a Long & Happy Marriage
Would you ever build a house without a solid foundation? Of course not! Then, shouldn’t you have as strong a foundation as possible for a lifelong commitment like marriage?
Studies show that couples who undergo pre-marital counselling in Singapore report higher levels of marital satisfaction, better communication, and lower divorce rates than those who don’t. Why? Because they’ve already learned how to talk through tough topics, navigate differences, and support each other through change, long before those challenges arise.
Marriage is a big transition – one that’s exciting, meaningful, and yes, sometimes challenging. Pre-marital counselling is a life-long investment that gives you the tools to step into it with open eyes and open hearts.
Final Thoughts
Remember, you don’t need to have existing problems to start pre-marital counselling in Singapore.
Think of it as a proactive step – a way to learn more about each other, prevent future conflict, and begin married life on the same page.
If you’re planning to get married or just starting to think about a life together, explore Talk Your Heart Out’s (TYHO’s) pre-marital counselling services in Singapore.
Our accredited marriage counsellors provide a safe, supportive and confidential space to navigate this beautiful journey together.
Ready to get started? Book your marriage counselling session today!
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