A person thinking about how to build habits with the help of a therapist in Singapore.

Habits hold immense power. 

Imagine waking up every morning at the same time and training your brain to think and act positively. Doing this builds strong neural connections. By maintaining a habit, you’re teaching your brain to become mentally resilient.  

That being said, building habits is hard. More so for people who already struggle with mental health issues 

If you’re depressed, getting out of bed can be a major task altogether. Brushing your teeth becomes strenuous. What were once basic human needs may now seem distant and taxing.  

“My brain and my heart are really important to me. I don’t know why I wouldn’t seek help to have those things be as healthy as my teeth.” 

 – Kerry Washington 

If you relate, we have some good news: Therapists in Singapore can teach you how to build habits.  

In fact, people from all walks of life with healthy or distressed mental health can reach out to professionals for personal development 

Just like we exercise to build muscles, we need to build our ‘mental muscles’ to protect our emotional well-being. In this article, we explore the science of how habits work, the techniques used by therapists, and how to start new habits.  

This Article Contains:

Science of How Habits Work

In a book called Atomic Habits, James Clear explains that all habits follow this order: cue, craving, response, and reward.  

  • The cue: The first step triggers your brain to engage in a behaviour. Identifying a cue means that we will eventually get a reward, and our brains love receiving rewards. Once we interpret the cue, we form thoughts and feelings that trigger cravings.  
  • Craving: The second step is the motivation behind every habit. We feel the urge to build a habit only because we crave change. However, our craving is directly attached to the result a habit might deliver rather than the habit itself. For example, we crave the desired body weight, not the process of exercising, dieting and maintaining a healthy lifestyle that might lead to weight loss 
  • Response: Our response, when performed regularly, becomes a habit. A habit can be in the form of a thought or behaviour.  
  • Rewards: The last step is the end of every habit.  

Think of it this way: The cue is looking at a fit body (ie reward), the craving is desiring the fit body for ourselves, and the response is our attempt to obtain the reward.  

Now that we know the science of habits, how do we change them?  

Behavior Change

A change in behaviour implies a change in identity. We start a habit because of the need to find joy, but as a regular practice, the habit becomes a trait of our personality.  

For example: 

  • If you’re motivated to start reading books, it’s because you want to ‘become’ a reader 
  • If you start running, you want to identify yourself as a ‘runner’  

Learning these habits means that they become a reliable solution to: 

  • Make positive changes in your personal, work, and relationships 
  • Develop healthy ways of thinking and reasoning 

In fact, conditions like social anxiety are made up of worries. From a mechanistic perspective, these thought patterns are learned and reinforced throughout life. 

Therefore, to counteract these habits, Therapists may use an alternative ‘habit-building’ tool like mindfulness to bring awareness to your cognitions and actively change them.  

Treating Anxiety Like a Habit: A Case Study

A case study was conducted in 2021 with a 40-year-old male with several physical and mental health issues. The participant also had panic disorder and generalised anxiety disorder (GAD) 

Let’s call the participant ‘A’. In the first clinic visit, researchers used the trigger-behaviour-reward model to address A’s anxiety.  

A was asked to map out habit loops based on the model in a week. After mapping out the details, A came to identify that he tends to stress eat as a habit whenever he feels anxious.  

As he became more aware of this habit formation, A started replacing stress eating with mindfulness techniques taught by the researchers.  

Over the next year, A’s anxiety returned to normal, he lost significant weight that was causing blood pressure issues, and he resumed living a normal and functional life.  

3 Techniques Used by Therapists

Therapists in Singapore may use many tools and exercises to facilitate habit formation.  

These techniques can help: 

  • Reduce mood swings 
  • Overcome emotions like shame and guilt 
  • Build confidence and happiness 
  • Reduce symptoms of distress 

Below are the 3 most effective techniques used by Therapists for positive therapy outcomes.  

TYHO Therapists can help you build positive habits.

1) Miracle Question

Miracle questions have the power for the Therapist to explore your inner world and find solutions to your problems.  

Therapists may ask you to imagine what an alternative reality could look like.  

For example, what does your ideal relationship look like? Which place of residence would keep you happy and safe for a long time?  

Your alternate reality is imagined to be better, ideal, and with minimal or no problems.  

During therapy sessions, your Therapist may: 

  • Negotiate and engage in back-and-forth dialogue to discover your hidden needs and desires 
  • Help you make sense of your alternate reality – is it coming from a place of wanting to please others, or do you truly desire it?  
  • Use insights to bring forth your ideas and goals in life 
  • Use explorative and introspective questions to introduce growth into the conversation 

As the Therapist challenges you to broaden your perspective, you may become more engaged in the therapy process. Your proactive involvement will result in valuable insights into building an ideal lifestyle.  

An Example of a Miracle Question

Miracle questions are used for individual, family, or couples therapy. The questions are also modified based on the type of approach used and the problems presented.  

Below is an example of the beginning stages of miracle questioning: 

‘This may sound strange to you, but imagine going to bed and sleeping at your usual time.  

When you wake up, suddenly, miraculously, your life has completely changed. Something exciting has happened.  

The problem you visited me with today does not exist anymore. You are happy, confident, healthy, and doing well in life.  

With this picture in mind, tell me, what difference would you first notice about yourself in this new life?’ 

2) If–Then Plans

In talk therapy, if-then planning can help you identify problematic situations and learn new behaviours to overcome them.  

If-then plans are helpful to build positive habits that you’ve already learnt in therapy. The technique can also be used for any other habits you want to form, like journaling, learning music, or painting.  

For example, in the context of learning therapeutic skills, imagine your Therapist in Singapore taught you a new tool to improve your sleeping habits.  

The professional has also assigned this technique as therapy homework that you may need to do between sessions. In this case, a relevant if-then plan might be, ‘If it’s after 5 pm, then I will only have water instead of coffee.’ 

The implementation of if-then plans specifies what habit to stick to during a particular situation.  

Examples of If-Then Plans

You may work with your Therapist to: 

  • First, identify what problems you want to solve in your life 
  • Second, come up with alternative habits that may help break unhealthy patterns 
  • Third, develop an if-then plan to build the new habit 

Below are some examples of if-then plans:  

  • If your goal is to avoid procrastination, you may say, ‘If it’s after 10 am, then I will not use any social media apps.’ 
  • If your goal is to improve your relationship, you might say, ‘If it’s a break time at work, then I will talk to a friend or check in with my family member.’ 

3) Motivational Interviewing (MI)

Many TYHO Therapists in Singapore are trained in motivational interviewing.  

During sessions, Therapists may ask constructive and motivational questions to elicit your desire for change.  

The key qualities of MI include the following: 

  • A facilitating style of communication in sessions that involves good listening and directing by the Therapists to help the client achieve the desired results 
  • An empowering dialogue exchange tool where therapists provide an objective outline of a person’s problems and capacities for change 
  • A restful and curious way of guiding clients to embrace their autonomy and the natural process of habit-building 

Examples of Motivational Interviewing

Questions focused on a client’s desire to change may include words like want, wish, or hope.  

For example:  

  • What changes do you hope to see in your behaviour? 
  • How do you want your ideal life to look?  
  • What is one thing that you wish were different in your life right now?  

Therapists may ask questions focused on ability as well. These questions may include elements like what the client can do or assess their capabilities for change.  

For example: 

  • If you want to start dating, how would you approach people?  
  • What would you change if I asked you to change one thing about your life right now?  
  • On a scale of 1 to 10, how confident are you in making that change?  

MI questions may also involve prompts. Therapists may focus on exploring the reasons that a client wants to change, even if they feel unprepared for it.  

For example:  

  • Why would you like to start dating? 
  • What compels you to change your life?  
  • What are the three best reasons for you to study this degree?  

Key Takeaways

  • The more you repeat a behaviour, the more you reinforce new patterns in your life. 
  • Building new habits includes cues, cravings, responses, and rewards. The process of truly changing your life begins with the awareness of the cue and the reward.  
  • Therapists use scientific tools like miracle questions, if-then plans, and motivational interviewing to elicit positive changes in your thinking and behaviour.  
  • Therapy can help not only with mental health issues but also if you want to improve your lifestyle, habits, and growth.  

At TYHO, we have a diverse pool of Therapists if you are ready to start the journey of change!  

Book a session with a qualified Therapist today!

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