January 2025 - Talk Your Heart Out (TYHO)

5 Tips to Prepare for an Effective First Therapy Session

Posted on January 20, 2025January 20, 2025 by Prath

Therapy in Singapore is a positive step many take to manage their emotions, adapt to changes, and learn problem-solving skills.

You might be nervous if you’ve never been to therapy for mental health before.

Planning can lessen anxiety and help you make the most out of what lies ahead.

Doing some simple things, like journaling, can also give you a better sense of what to expect and increase the chances of having a positive experience.

In this article, we will write about the 5 things you can do before your first therapy session. And don’t worry – it’s easier than you think, and these steps can set you up for success from the start.

This Article Contains:

1. Do Your Research

Right after you book your therapy session, take a moment to reflect on what you want to accomplish.

Doing your personal research can help you remember key points during therapy and set the direction towards your most relevant goals.

Focus on tracking your mental health and important therapy goals.

a. Track Your Mental Health

Consider tracking information related to your mood, energy levels, sleep quality, stress levels, thought patterns, motivations, and physical symptoms.

We encourage you to choose any aspects that you prefer to improve.

Either create a sheet to track each point in a specific way (eg using emojis to represent emotions) or write a detailed journal about your day-to-day experiences.

Journaling gives you a head-start for therapy by helping you better understand your needs.

Research also shows that writing about upsetting events can help improve your mental and physical health and bolster the impact of therapy sessions.

b. Write Your Goals

Setting up therapy for success begins with knowing which direction you want your life to take and who you want to become.

While your therapist can help you with goal-setting, it is still useful to contemplate your goals well before. Visualise how you would like your life to look after you decide to terminate therapy.

Here’s a prompt to help you:

“What does getting better mean to me?”

Some examples of therapy goals can look like:

Prioritising my needs in interpersonal relationships

Managing work-life balance

Reducing anxiety around life changes

Healing from negative childhood experiences

Tip: Think about your goals in terms of measurable outcomes so you can recognise the changes when you actually achieve them. For example, if your goal is to reduce stress, you can measure it by noticing reduced heart palpitations, fewer headaches, and so on.

Your goals can also help track progress during therapy.

Discuss your ideas during the first session so that you can align them with the therapist’s approach and work towards achieving your identified goals.

2. Prepare Questions to Ask Your Therapist

The therapist is a stranger in your first session. Preparing a list of questions to analyse their profile can help you mitigate any discomfort you may have.

Don’t be afraid to ask questions you may have already encountered in their description. Therapy is your chance to gain as much clarity as you need to get started.

Some questions you can ask include:

Can you explain your background and experiences in detail?

How do you generally approach problems during sessions?

When can I expect to notice changes in my life?

Will you be teaching me skills to manage my emotions?

Will you predominantly focus on my childhood experiences, or will we majorly discuss current problems?

Do my presenting problems align with the areas you specialise in?

How much experience do you have in handling my specific issue?

How do you handle situations where progress feels slow or stagnant?

75% of people find talk therapy effective. Find a TYHO Therapist today for help with emotional distress.

3. Talk to Your Loved Ones

Share your thoughts and feelings about therapy with others whenever you feel comfortable.

Community or family support, whatever is available to you at this moment, can help you reduce potential feelings of apprehension about therapy.

You may be surprised how common it is to seek therapy in Singapore. If the person you talk to also sees a therapist, it can be comforting to share your experiences with each other.

Often, your loved ones may provide you with a fresh perspective about issues you may be struggling with.

For example, your friend might be able to see that you’re getting more anxious about work events that could have escaped your notice. By having open conversations, you can even streamline your therapy goals.

If you feel hesitant to start a conversation, send a text message to a friend. You can say: “Hey, I want to talk to you about starting therapy. Can I vent my feelings to you?”

After a few exchanges, you can discuss the topic in person before starting your therapy!

4. Seek Therapy With an Open Mind

The first few therapy sessions are always about identifying areas you want to work on and assessing if your therapist is the right fit for you.

To do so, you may have to answer several questions and engage in a deep and honest conversation. However, try not to fret – your therapist will be compassionate and guide you through the process.

If you are not ready to explore certain areas, you can ask the time for it or even share why it’s hard for you to open up.

All therapists are committed to helping you heal and grow. Although it may initially feel awkward to talk about the most intimate details of your life, try to have an open mind and note that:

The more effort you put into therapy, the more you will gain from it.

Being forthcoming about your struggles and how difficult the process feels can help your therapist support you better.

If you do not feel heard or validated during sessions, ask your therapist if they are willing to modify their approach or treatment plan.

Similarly, have frequent conversations about meeting goals and tracking progress.

Remember that therapy can take time, and change will happen slowly. Give yourself a couple of weeks to determine if you need to change a therapist.

5. Schedule Time for Post-Therapy Reflection

Therapy sessions can be tiring as you may be talking about deep-rooted issues or childhood negative experiences.

Schedule some time after therapy to reflect on how it went and what you would like to do differently next time.

Some common emotions people may experience post-therapy include:

Emotionally exhausted

Worried

Anxious

Tired

Although the above emotions are natural, they are only temporary. Reflect on how you feel on a broader scale.

For example, are you hopeful about the future but at the same time worried about meeting those goals? The temporary emotion here may be the worry (which you will experience after the session), but on a broader scale, you are feeling hopeful and looking forward to continuing the sessions.

The latter is what you may want to focus most on.

To identify your temporary and extensive emotions, journal your thoughts. Sometimes, going for a walk or painting may also help. Try engaging in any activity that feels therapeutic to you.

Post-therapy reflection is important as it can help you process all the emotions from the therapy and clear your mind. You can also talk to your therapist about working on therapy homework as a way to reflect on sessions.

Key Takeaways

Preparing well in advance for your first therapy session can help you reduce anxiety and negative thoughts.

Taking some time to track your mental health and contemplating your goals can help you create a strong foundation for therapy progress.

Being open-minded about the changes in therapy and addressing your concerns right away by talking to your therapist can help improve your therapy experience.

Seeking a new therapist if things don’t progress even after several weeks is completely normal and recommended.

Honesty with Your Therapist: 3 Ways It Can Transform Your Therapy Sessions

Posted on January 20, 2025January 20, 2025 by Prath

Whether it’s out of fear, embarrassment, shame, or guilt, many clients hesitate to be completely open with their therapist.

Research from 2018 found that nearly 84% of people have concealed personal truths, like having suicidal thoughts.

However, therapists are trained to provide compassion and build the foundation of trust even when clients aren’t fully transparent.

Once the trust is established, the therapeutic experience can deepen.

That’s why it’s important to understand how being honest can truly transform your therapy sessions.

This Article Contains:

Should I Tell My Therapist Everything?

The short answer is yes; you should tell your therapist everything.

But you don’t need to share everything immediately. It’s normal to take time to feel comfortable.

Initially, your therapist may focus on building rapport and gaining a radical understanding of your personality and problems.

As you start to feel safe, you can gradually share details about yourself to increase the effectiveness of therapy.

Tip: Write down key points about your issues (eg self-esteem or loneliness). You can work on one issue for several sessions before moving on to the next. This approach helps you manage feelings of vulnerability and allows you to set the pace of therapy.

If opening up still feels uncomfortable, talk to your therapist. Together, you can explore any feelings of shame or guilt that may be keeping you from being fully honest.

Common Reasons You May Lie to Your Therapist

People often lie in therapy out of fear of judgment, shame, guilt, or embarrassment.

1. Fear of Judgement

We may lie during therapy for the same reasons we lie to our loved ones – to avoid judgment or criticism.

For example, a client who struggles with self-harm may hesitate to open up due to the fear that the therapist may not believe them. The client may feel invalidated, humiliated, and fearful of sharing their intrusive thoughts if such is the case.

Lying during therapy can also happen because you may have felt judged in your relationships, in academia, or the workplace.

Maybe you were not provided the space in your family to feel your emotions. Perhaps your parents criticised you for talking about your distress.

These experiences of judgment can surface during therapy sessions and affect our honesty.

2. Shame, Guilt, or Embarrassment

Shame can make us feel detached from therapy, especially if it’s due to childhood events like bullying or strict parenting.

Embarrassment may occur when you believe your experiences are ‘bad’ or something is inherently ‘wrong’ with you.

Guilt usually manifests itself when you engage in destructive behaviours. For example, the habit of binge eating after a bad day at work can lead to self-blame.

Theoretically, you may be aware that bingeing food could be self-destructive. Hence, after you engage in the behaviour, the guilt of knowing that you did something harmful to yourself may prevent you from opening up about it.

3. Feeling Like Your Experiences Are Isolating

If you think your issues are unique, you may avoid discussing them.

For example, mental health issues like depression or stress can feel deeply isolating. Symptoms of these issues look different in everyone and may thus become ‘invisible’.

Depressive thoughts like, “Nobody can understand what goes on in my head” can make it harder to open up.

Feeling isolated may prevent you from being honest, and not talking about your issue can make you feel isolated. This is a painful cycle to be stuck in.

What if I feel these emotions during therapy?

As scary as it may be, all these emotions are valid. You are not alone. If you identify the above emotions in yourself, it is important to talk to your therapist. Consider sending a text message about your feelings if talking about them feels overwhelming.

Here’s a prompt to help you initiate the discussion. Say: “I’m having a hard time being honest during therapy sessions. I feel ___ and would like to explore the emotion.”

3 Reasons to Be Honest With Your Therapist

Being honest with your therapist can not only improve your therapy experience but also help you reach your goals faster.

Below are 3 benefits of opening up:

1. Improves the Quality of Therapy Sessions

You have already made an honest and vulnerable statement by letting your therapist know about your fear of opening up.

Vulnerability in therapy can help you open new doors and explore problems with a deeper understanding.

Your honesty can even help break through any plateaus during therapy (ie not progressing).

This new therapy door can:

Give you space to talk about issues you may have forgotten

Help you feel empowered

Equip you with new and effective therapy skills

Teach you how to gain a radical understanding of yourself and of the world

Help you gain positive therapy outcomes

2. Gives Your Therapist the Chance to Help You

Tip to open up during therapy: “I can’t talk about an issue right now, but I’m ready to try opening up with your support.”

Making a statement like the above should allow your therapist to check in and help you.

During therapy sessions, your therapist may use guided conversations to slowly ease you into the topic and explore areas that may stand in the way of honesty.

Asking for help is a powerful way to grow out of fear.

By being honest, you tell yourself that you are:

Willing to seek help and improve your mental health

Ready to tackle challenges

Ready to face your feelings and move on from negative experiences

Looking forward to healing

3. Helps You Face Your Fears and Reduces Anxiety

You are already facing your fears when you open up during therapy.

It’s like peeling off a bandage – you know it will sting, but you can see the wound healing once it’s off.

On the other side of the fear, there is immense possibility to reduce your anxiety, overcome distress, and heal from trauma.

Remember that the more effort you put into therapy, the more you will get out of it.

For example, the more honest you are, the better your therapist can understand what you’re going through and offer the right support.

Every time you confront a fear, you build resilience.

Ultimately, your honesty in therapy will lead to a stronger therapist-client relationship and allow for profound healing.

How Being Honest Can Transform Your Therapy Sessions

For therapy to be transformational, it requires you to be upfront about your life.

The therapist-client relationship is improved when you prioritise honesty during therapy.

Honesty -> Strong therapeutic alliance -> Better therapy outcomes

But how do you improve the bond with your therapist?

Firstly, know that your therapist will take control of this aspect and work together with you to build rapport.

From your side, however, you can focus on three points:

Goal setting

Communication

Firstly, when you and your therapist agree on your goals, it can improve outcomes, satisfaction, and motivation to progress.

Try to list down some common goals that you would like to achieve. Remember to set SMART goals (Specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-limited).

Some common therapy goals are:

- Improving work-life balance and healing from burnout

- Building skills to manage and reduce panic attacks or anxious thoughts

- Increasing emotional intimacy with a romantic partner to have open conversations and overcome conflicts

- Developing assertiveness to feel confident in social situations

Secondly, a key component of a strong therapeutic alliance is improving the bond between you and your therapist.

To do so, try to be communicative about your life experiences and feelings. Remember that all your emotions are real and valid.

Your openness can help your therapist establish a solid therapeutic foundation and relationship.

Lastly, being honest can lead to developing a more personalised therapy approach.

For example, deep conversations with your therapist may have helped you realise that while you feel comfortable discussing present problems, you struggle to recall your childhood experiences.

By sharing this, your therapist can adjust their approach, maybe focusing on hypnosis first and then moving towards talk therapy to explore the topic in depth when you are ready.

What if You Don’t Feel Comfortable Opening Up to Your Therapist?

If you don’t feel comfortable opening up during therapy sessions, try:

Grounding yourself: Take some time before therapy to mentally prepare yourself. Meditate or go for a short walk to clear your head. Tell yourself this mantra: “I may not enjoy opening up, but I am safe, and I trust the process.”

Starting small: Talk about a minor issue that has been bugging you. For example, talk about a small argument with your mother. This is similar to ‘testing the waters’ – trying something small to see if it works out. Once you find out that you feel safe, move on to slightly more sensitive topics.

Referencing your experience: If you have seen or read something similar that you have experienced but are hesitant to talk about – try to bring in that reference during therapy. Read the reference content out loud and let your therapist guide you towards a deeper conversation.

Conclusion

Therapy explores the grittiest parts of our lives – so it is common for clients to avoid being honest due to the pain of their experiences. Therapists understand this feeling and will provide the space and time for you to get comfortable.

When you struggle to be honest, think about why you started therapy. Was it to improve the quality of life? Or accepting yourself for who you are?

Remind yourself that being honest can improve the quality of therapy sessions, provide you with personalised coping skills, help you overcome fear and anxiety, and lead you towards positive and successful therapy outcomes.

A Comprehensive Guide to Starting Therapy

Posted on January 14, 2025January 20, 2025 by Prath

Almost 75% of people in talk therapy see positive outcomes within a few months.

Are you lost and confused? Unhappy? Not entirely sure what you’re feeling?

Daily life stressors can make you feel that way. Yet, if these feelings last longer than a few weeks, it could indicate signs of mental health issues.

The issues people commonly face include anxiety, depression, stress, lack of confidence, trauma-related disorders, negative thoughts and so on.

There are several ways to manage these issues on your own. For example, building community support, developing healthy relationships, creating a self-care routine, journaling, or meditation can help manage your emotions.

However, when these habits aren’t enough, therapy can provide a non-judgmental space to help regain control over yourself and your life.

But if you’ve never been to mental health therapy before, the process may seem complicated.

What if you don’t know what to say? What if your therapist doesn’t like you? Or what if you don’t like your therapist? There are too many questions.

Fortunately, you can explore all of them during therapy.

To help you get started, we’ve curated a therapy guide for beginners, from when you should start therapy to the termination process and everything in between.

This Article Contains:

When Should I Start Therapy?

When to start therapy is one of the most asked questions. While there are several reasons to seek help, one word can sum up the purpose of it: change.

You may need therapy if there’s something in your life you’re struggling to change on your own.

Do you want to change how you think or feel?

Are you stuck engaging in habits that are not serving you?

Do you feel like you’re stuck in a loop without understanding why or how to break out of it?

If you answered yes to the above questions, give therapy a try.

Think of therapy as a mirror where you can see yourself – with all your complexities – through the eyes of a trained professional. When looked at consistently, this mirror can help you break through your tunnel-vision perspective of who you are.

Some of the common signs you need therapy include:

You feel on edge all the time, and it’s affecting your mood, relationships, work, and other areas of your life.

You feel stuck and hopeless even when you’re constantly looking for ways to feel emotionally satisfied.

You can’t stop yourself from engaging in the same negative patterns that are causing you stress and anxiety (eg drinking too much when you can’t process your emotions, avoiding your loved ones etc).

Signs of your mental health issues keep getting worse regardless of what you do to take care of yourself.

People might tell you that you need therapy if they don’t understand the way you function or if you live unconventionally. But you may need therapy only if you want something about your life to be different.

Do I Need Therapy if My Problems Aren’t ‘Big Enough’?

The short answer is yes!

The long answer, however, has much to do with our perception of ‘big problems’.

People often minimise their issues because they believe that their problems aren’t big enough. However, instead of focusing on the problem, we might need to shift our focus towards the impact the situation has on us.

The reality is that there’s no such thing as a trauma threshold we must reach to deserve professional help.

Just because others may have ‘bigger’ problems doesn’t mean yours don’t hurt.

In fact, our brain can make us feel bad regardless of the severity of the situation. A small problem can affect you just as much as going through something deeply traumatic.

Early intervention for mental health can give you the tools you need to recognise the signs of distress and cope with them.

Your feelings and struggles are valid, regardless of how big or small you think they are.

Moreover, therapy for minor issues can even prepare you to become self-reliant in the future.

Therapy Self-Assessment

Below is a mental health quiz that you can take to know your state of mind and the intensity of your psychological distress.

After you complete the test, you will receive a score and a recommendation.

Please remember that this test does not provide a diagnosis. Only a psychiatrist or psychologist can formally diagnose.

This mental health quiz will take around 3-5 minutes of your time.

How Can Therapy Help Me?

Now that you know that seeking therapy in Singapore before your problems blow up is a great way to become self-reliant, you may wonder how therapy works.

Therapists may focus on two categories during sessions: presenting problems and personal growth.

Personal growth is an ongoing process of working towards your ideal self/life and focusing on positive self-development.

Presenting problems may include challenges that are affecting the quality of your daily life (ie disorders or mental health issues).

In general, the benefits of therapy may include:

Gaining a deeper understanding of yourself, your goals, and your values

Managing your emotions

Identifying and reducing stress or work-related burnout

Dealing with unhealthy coping mechanisms

Exploring childhood and intergenerational trauma

Learning how to be kind and compassionate to yourself

Developing healthy and effective social and communication skills

Overcoming people-pleasing tendencies

Regardless of the reason, you may find that the benefits of therapy are endless. There is something for everyone to take away.

Types of Therapy

Read on to learn about the five types of therapy and how they can help you.

1. Individual Therapy

We provide individual therapy in Singapore to help you explore your thoughts and feelings in a confidential environment.

The key to success during therapy is to maintain a healthy relationship with your Therapist.

Unlike other types of therapy, you are the only focus during individual therapy. Hence, you may have space and more time to understand and equip yourself with relevant coping strategies.

Being in therapy can help you:

Improve your self-esteem and confidence

Overcome existential crisis

Manage low moods and depression

Deal with feelings of shame and guilt

Handle conflicts in relationships or friendships

2. Couples Therapy

Do you believe that couples therapy is only for those who have problems? That’s not actually true!

Couples therapy in Singapore can act as a preventive intervention to keep a relationship on track before things get worse.

Every couple may fight, but how do we prevent the arguments from slowly piling up, only to explode later in life?

Couples therapists can act as a neutral party and help resolve the stack of problems so that they don’t collapse.

Therapy can also help improve your interpersonal dynamics, making it a pleasant experience to share your life with your partner.

As a couple, you may gain several therapy benefits, such as:

Solving communication problems

Dealing with conflicts

Improving trust among each other

Learning how to mutually respect and support each other

Improving intimacy

3. Marriage Counselling

Marriage can be a beautiful journey, but it’s not always easy.

Sometimes, it can be so challenging that you may become confused or lost about how to solve problems.

You may lose your identity while trying to deal with marital issues such as family stress, unrealistic expectations, and poor communication.

Most of these problems may occur due to a lack of understanding or emotional bonding. This is where marriage counselling in Singapore can be helpful.

If you’re seeking mental health therapy as a married couple, you can:

Rebuild trust

Develop communication and listening skills

Talk through difficult topics without leading to an argument

Improve sex and emotional intimacy

Reduce family and parental stress

Learn how to manage personal, work, and family time

Process feelings related to grief, health problems, or life changes

4. Family Therapy

Family members may have unique personalities, which may clash and cause conflict.

Conflicts among family members can take a toll on everyone involved. However, family therapy in Singapore can help with:

Evaluating and solving mental health issues

Resolving harmful habits and thoughts

Addressing and managing relationship issues and dynamics

Unlike individual therapy, where the focus is only on one person, family therapists may focus on the set of relationships that make up the entire family.

Moreover, family therapy can help:

Improve communication and interpersonal skills

Resolve conflicts

Provide personalised therapeutic plans to manage mental health issues that one or more family members may have

Develop collaborative and individual coping strategies

Family therapy has positive effects on nearly 80% of families.

5. Child Therapy

Children may face the world with whatever information they are aware of (which, in general, could be limited due to their age and adaptability).

Many kids may struggle with low self-esteem, lack of confidence, bullying, harassment, academic pressure, issues with parents, and so on.

Child therapy in Singapore can help address these challenges with age-appropriate therapeutic techniques.

Some benefits of child therapy may include:

Learning how to love oneself

Developing social skills

Identifying and expressing emotions

Fixing maladaptive behaviours (eg bullying others, binge eating)

Coping with negative thoughts

Learning how to make and maintain friendships

Improving attention and concentration

Tips to Find the Right Therapist

It’s easy to get the impression that all therapists are the same. However, just as you may prefer the approach of certain medical doctors over others, the same applies to therapy.

Here’s how to find a therapist in five simple steps:

Identify Your Goals: Before doing anything else, think about why you need therapy. Are you stressed? Do you want to fix your relationship? Identifying your goals can make the therapist selection process easier.

Review Therapist Profiles: Look for information such as qualifications, types of therapy, approach, and personal background.

Choose Your Modality: Decide whether you prefer in-person or online therapy in Singapore. Consider your comfort (eg can you open up in a new place?) and convenience (eg do you have privacy for video calls?) while deciding.

Interview the Therapists: Ask questions about the therapist’s experience and approach to check if they align with your needs.

Check Your Comfort Level: After a few sessions, check how comfortable you feel with the therapist. Comfort, trust, and mutual respect are essential for a successful therapeutic relationship. If you feel heard, respected, and empowered in the sessions, you’ve likely found a good match.

Step-by-Step Guide to Booking a Session at TYHO

If you’re looking to start therapy with TYHO, follow these steps:

STEP 1: Create an account with us to begin the TYHO Therapist selection process.

STEP 2: Decide on a service (eg individual, couples, marriage, family, or child therapy) and use the filter to search by location, Therapist name, or issues.

STEP 3: Review the relevant profiles that show up, watch the Therapist’s introductory videos, and read their descriptions and client reviews to shortlist your options.

STEP 4: Click the ‘Book Now’ button to select the service, medium, and slot.

STEP 5: Click on ‘Pay & Confirm’ to book your first session. You will find all your scheduled sessions and other details on your dashboard!

What Type of Therapy Is Right for Me?

Choosing the right therapy method may be confusing if you don’t know what information to look for.

Your therapy experience can increase significantly based on the right approach. Here’s an overview of the most common types of therapy:

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT): Doing CBT helps us reframe our negative thoughts and emotions into healthier alternatives. Some sub-types of CBT are acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), mindfulness-based stress reduction (MBSR), and dialectical behavioural therapy (DBT).

Solution-Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT): During SFBT, a therapist may use tools such as miracle questions (ie reflecting on how different our lives would be without current problems) and goal setting to come up with practical solutions.

Person-Centred Approach: Therapists may focus on the client entirely during the person-centred approach. During sessions, therapists guide their clients towards realistic solutions and broaden their perspective about themselves and the world.

Even knowing as much as you’ve just read can help you make an informed decision about choosing the right therapy!

Should I Go for Online or In-Person Therapy?

When thinking about offline vs online therapy, you may have to consider your:

Personal preferences

Comfort (eg using technology or travelling to a location)

Therapeutic needs

Presenting problems

Availability

Some of the pros of in-person therapy in Singapore may include:

Nonverbal communication: Seeing a therapist face-to-face gives them more chance to interpret your nonverbal cues. Identifying nonverbal cues can help your therapist better understand your needs.

Neutral location: In-person sessions may take place in a Therapist’s office or a TYHO room, which can give you an outlet away from your regular life. A neutral location can also be helpful to maintain full confidentiality.

Some of the pros of online therapy in Singapore may include:

Affordability: Taking online sessions means that you can cut costs on travel and room expenses.

Comfort: You can opt for online therapy from the comfort of your room or house to feel safe during sessions.

One type of modality is not better than the other.

Try to compare the pros of online vs offline therapy and decide which advantages matter the most to you.

How to Prepare for Your First Therapy Session

You’ve finally booked your first therapy session – congratulations! Now, you might be wondering about preparing for therapy.

Below are 3 first therapy session tips to help you get started:

1. Outline Your Goals and Reasons for Therapy

Journaling your thoughts and understanding exactly what you might need to talk about with your therapist can be helpful.

You can make a bullet list that includes:

Your symptoms

Thoughts and feelings

Habits you want to stop

Past experiences that may be contributing to your unhealthy patterns

Current life stressors

2. Prepare a List of Questions to Ask the Therapist

Think of your first therapy session as a mutual interview. This is the time you can utilise to get to know your Therapist and make adjustments accordingly.

For example:

Do you want to know about your Therapist’s political views?

Are you curious about their availability outside therapy sessions?

Do you need your therapist to use your preferred pronouns?

Do you want to work with a Therapist who understands and makes the best use of your religious practices?

Asking questions can help you finalise the Therapist and set the tone for future sessions.

3. Prepare in Advance for Post-Therapy Reflection

Therapy sessions require serious emotional work and can have you feeling tired or numb, especially after the first therapy session.

If possible, try to clear your calendar after you finish your session. Give yourself a relaxing break – visit the cafe, read a book, or take a nap if that helps.

Remember to reflect on your session leisurely and after you collect your thoughts.

Exclusive Tips from a TYHO Therapist to Make the Most Out of Therapy

Helen – Clinical Psychologist

Before your first therapy session, consider why you seek therapy and what you hope to achieve or improve as a result. The therapist will likely ask, “What brought you here?” and “What is your therapy goal?” at the first session.
Discussing and aligning with your therapist on what you hope to get out of therapy will enable the therapist to design a therapy plan that fits your needs and to track your progress.
Think about the challenges or issues you have been facing and be ready to share them with your therapist. For example, when did it start? What could have triggered it? What about its duration, frequency, and intensity? How is it impacting your daily functioning? What are your thoughts and feelings about it?
Preparing and sharing this information with your therapist will help the therapist understand the background, context, and severity of your challenge and its impact on your life.
Be open and honest about your challenges, views, and feelings during therapy sessions. Therapists have been trained to create a psychologically safe environment and build rapport with clients to facilitate candid conversations and effective interventions.
A strong and trusting therapeutic relationship between therapist and client is a critical success factor to achieve the desired therapeutic outcomes.
Commit to completing the ‘homework’ assigned by your therapist. This can include worksheets to log your feelings and thoughts, reflections on what was discussed in sessions, or new behaviours to try out.
Therapy is most effective when work is “done” during and between sessions. Proactively sharing your experiences and what worked or did not work with your therapist will enable your therapist to adjust the interventions accordingly to best meet your therapy goal.

What to Expect in Your First Therapy Session

The first therapy session is usually known as the intake session. Your Therapist may use the 1-hour time to set expectations and build trust with you.

Setting expectations could mean discussing about the Therapist’s:

Background and qualifications

Style of conducting therapeutic modalities

Specialisations, types of therapy, and how it could help your unique situation

Experience working with similar issues

Availability and preferred timings to meet for future sessions

After the initial discussion, you may be expected to talk about your mental health history, medical and family history, past and current relationships, background and work type etc.

How Long Will Therapy Take and How Often Should I Go?

Typically, you may notice changes in a few weeks based on your presenting problems.

However, it can take a few months or more if you’ve been struggling with mental health issues for a long time.

Therapy duration and outcomes are as unique as you are. There is no timeline that works for everyone universally.

The only universal concept that works for everyone is consistency and openness. The more consistent you are, the sooner you may notice the benefits.

Therapy is a journey to build a solid foundation for your long-term mental health.

Similarly, therapy frequency depends on several factors, such as:

Your availability

Affordability

Personal preferences

Therapist’s recommendations

Some people may want sessions every week, while others can only afford to book sessions bi-weekly.

Try to have an open conversation with your Therapist to determine what works best for you!

I Don’t Like My Therapist: What Can I Do?

You worked hard to find a therapist in Singapore. But what do you do if you don’t like your therapist?

Please know that you don’t have to suffer in silence. It’s okay to switch therapists if the fit isn’t right.

The first thing to do is figure out why you don’t like your therapist.

Do you feel judged? Do your conversations or exchanges not make sense? Or do you simply feel that something is off?

Once you understand the reason, the second thing to do is to talk to the therapist. If your therapist is understanding, they will work with you to figure out what’s wrong or help you find someone who suits your needs.

Talking about your preferences could be a turning point – either to fix the therapeutic alliance or to find someone better.

Should I Tell My New Therapist About My Previous Therapist?

Yes! Sharing past therapy experiences with your new therapist can help them learn about your preferences.

You can share what didn’t work during sessions. If you parted with your old therapist on good terms, they may share their therapy notes with your consent.

The disclosure of therapy history is usually helpful in making the transition smoother and improving new therapist communication.

4 Exercises to Improve Your Mental Health Outside Therapy

There might be times when therapy in Singapore may be out of reach.

Although mental health therapy is an essential part of caring for your psychological well-being, you can still use the tips below to regulate your emotions and manage your well-being.

Below are therapy strategies that you may use during therapy or can self-learn through free online resources.

The 4 tips are:

Track daily progress
Use self-care CBT tools
Strengthen social connections
Practice mindfulness & meditation

1. Track Daily Progress

Mental health exercises like tracking your daily mood swings, behavioural patterns, and general progress can give you a bigger picture of how to manage your issues.

To make the most out of this therapy strategy, try to create three columns: date, mood, and notes.

In the mood column, you can either use emojis or words like ‘sad’ and ‘happy’ to record your state of mind.

In the note column, try to journal your thoughts. Write about why you are sad/happy, what you did that day, and if you engaged in any mindfulness and meditation exercises.

Tracking daily mental health progress can also remind you to check in on yourself and help you identify patterns that are serving you.

2. Use Self- Care CBT Tools

Professionals commonly use cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) to treat issues such as depression, anxiety, stress, and addiction.

CBT tools in Singapore are also intended to be used outside therapy sessions. Using such therapy strategies outside sessions is one of the biggest benefits of therapy.

You can sign up for guided courses or mental health apps to get started with these CBT tools in Singapore.

Using self-care CBT tools is also known as self-directed therapy. Remember that these tips are not a replacement for traditional therapy. Still, it can supplement your mental health journey when you can’t afford therapy.

Some activities you can do to use self-care CBT tools include:

Journalling

Self-guided relaxation techniques

Relaxed breathing

Cognitive restructuring (ie identifying your distortions and actively changing them to helpful thoughts)

3. Strengthen Social Connections

Although focusing on social relationships sounds simple, it can greatly improve your emotional and mental wellness.

Studies indicate that connecting to other people can provide a sense of meaning in life and decrease loneliness.

To connect with other people, you can:

Talk to friends who understand your struggles

Reach out to supportive family members

Find new friends and community to hang out with

Join group therapy

Join free support groups to find like-minded people

When we talk about social connections, it could also involve pets and animals.

Recent research shows that animals can increase self-compassion, reduce anxiety, and make it easier to meet new people.

If you don’t have a pet, you can try to volunteer at a local animal shelter or work part-time to foster dogs and cats.

The most important thing to focus on is to find a community that makes you feel comfortable and loved.

4. Practise Mindfulness & Meditation

Trained professionals conduct mindfulness exercises in Singapore, or you can learn them yourself through free online resources.

Mindfulness and meditation exercises are an extremely popular stress-relieving self-care tool and help you become more attuned to yourself, your thoughts and emotions.

Research shows that learning breathwork, which is a type of mindfulness exercise, can help manage anxiety and reduce symptoms of chronic stress and depression.

Breathwork is learning how to regulate the flow of your breathing patterns to change your emotional and psychological state.

To get started, you can try the 4-7-8 breath to manage stress.

4-7-8 breath, or relaxing breath, is one of the therapy strategies that involves inhaling for four counts, holding the breath for seven counts, and exhaling for eight counts.

Try the relaxing breath before your bedtime or during stressful moments to alleviate tension. You can use free counter apps if you find it hard to keep count.

Remember to inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth. Repeat this cycle for four cycles or for however long you need to calm down.

The core of mindfulness and meditation exercises is learning breathwork. Once you understand how breathwork works, you can maintain different types of counts for inhaling, holding breath, and exhaling.

“There is no good or bad meditation — there is simply awareness or non-awareness. To begin with, we get distracted a lot. Over time, we get distracted less. Be gentle with your approach, be patient with the mind, and be kind to yourself along the way.” - Andy Puddicombe.

Prompts to Check In with Yourself

Sometimes, when you’re feeling distressed or unhappy, checking in with yourself is an easy way to connect with your emotions and thoughts.

By using self-check-in prompts, you can become more aware of yourself, how you function, the patterns helping you, and how to manage your feelings better.

While it is hard to engage in personal reflection prompts when you’re sad or frustrated, learning to break free from negative patterns and turning your focus inward can be hugely beneficial.

When you regularly do mental health check-ins, you can:

Develop self-compassion

Treat yourself with the same kindness you would offer a friend

Manage your emotions

Improve your self-understanding

Some prompts to help you check in with yourself include:

1. Food and Hydration 🥗

Did you eat a balanced meal today?

Are you giving your body enough water throughout the day?

Have you had any fruits or vegetables today?

Are you hydrating yourself?

Have you had a snack or meal that makes you feel energised?

Did you start your day with a nourishing breakfast?

Have you taken time to enjoy your food today?

2. Quality of Sleep 💤

How rested do you feel this morning?

Did you wake up feeling refreshed or groggy?

Were you able to wind down before bed?

Did you have any vivid dreams or nightmares?

How many times did you wake up during the night?

Did you go to bed at a consistent time?

Have you created a calm environment for sleep?

Did you get enough sleep?

3. Feelings, Thoughts & Body Sensations 💆

How are you feeling right now?

Are there any thoughts on your mind?

Is your body giving you any signals, like discomfort or numbness?

You might feel stress, worry, sadness, confusion, anger, or even tired or hungry. What are you noticing?

Does your body feel tense, relaxed, or somewhere in between?

Are you feeling any emotions or sensations that you want to take a moment to acknowledge?

4. Reassessing Your Life 🤔

What tasks or responsibilities do you have right now?

Is there anything you can take off your list or put on hold?

Are there any commitments or expectations that feel too heavy to manage?

Can you let go of things that aren’t as important or can wait?

Are you holding onto any unrealistic expectations for yourself that you could adjust?

What could you do to make your load feel lighter today?

5. Support and Coping 🙌

By letting something go, what could you invite into your life that feels helpful?

What do you and your body need at this moment?

What has helped you feel better or supported in the past?

Is there someone you trust, like a friend, family member, or therapist, that you’d like to talk to?

Would reaching out to a community or support group help right now?

How can you give yourself the support you need today?

Crisis Support & Additional Resources

Life can feel overwhelming due to emotional and physical challenges like stress, work demands, relationships, or health issues.

You may want to share your feelings with a close friend to cope during these times.

However, your loved ones may not be available during crisis situations. That’s why we’ve provided a range of mental health resources in Singapore to help you deal with crisis situations.

During a mental health crisis or when someone is in danger, it’s important to seek emergency mental health help immediately.

Below are resources to help you or someone you care about during critical moments:

Emergency Medical Services

If you or someone you know is in immediate harm, call emergency medical services at 995 or approach the A&E department of your nearest hospital.

Suicide Prevention and Crisis Helplines

Samaritans of Singapore (SOS): Call 1767 or WhatsApp 9151 1767 for support

National Anti-Violence & Sexual Harassment (NAVH): 1800 777 0000

Mental Health Emergency Helplines

Institute of Mental Health (IMH): 6389 2222

Singapore Association for Mental Health: 1800 283 7019

TOUCH Community Service (youth counselling services): 1800 377 2252

Conclusion

Therapy is an active intervention in overall wellness because we all grow into beautifully complex adults with many problems and joys in our lives. Starting therapy can help you manage any current problems like anxiety or relationship issues and equip you with tools to handle conflicts in the future.

Whether you choose or in-person or online therapy, make sure that your needs, goals, and preferences align with your therapist’s. Finding the right therapist is key to receiving positive therapy outcomes.

Before your first sessions, outline your goals, list questions to ask your therapist, and prepare for post-therapy reflection for a smooth experience.

Along with your therapy journey, remember to also engage in self-care habits like mindfulness, journalling, and maintaining social connections to maintain and improve your overall lifestyle!